MY BLOG!!

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Just realize that I am such a failure...

Sis called back from Japan and I picked up the phone. It was thru her that i rem that 2day is Mum's bdae. Haiz... sis living so far away from us could still rem that 2day is Mum's bdae and she took the effort to call back to wish her and yet the son staying everyday with her under the same roof cannot rem such a trivial thing.
To make up for it, i brought her an apple strudel. Damn it... The durian one that mum like was snatched up by this guy who i think left only 10mins b4 me.

Troubled by alot of things recently. Both trivial things as well as important things. Little things always have the effect of snowballing into some big when u start ignoring them n the worst thing is they keep haunting u!! Haha
Hmm... interest or "interest"? Whichever is the more essential thing in life?
To follow your dreams n the things you like and lead a fullfilling life that can satisfy your inner self and emotions??
OR
To satisfy the palpable monetary side that governs all your interest? To lead a leg-shaking life w/o worries for the sky rocking COE, monthly installments, house loan? I have to make choices. Something that might turn up bad...... like say, stranded in isolation in Middle East.
Some how or rather i admit that i am a shallow and materialistic bastard so i chose the latter one... $$ is the root of all evil, haha such a lousy yet specific way of putting it.

OFFSHORE!! here I come!!

CANTtakeIT;3:26 AM

'andI;

Name CCK
BDAE 24 Nov 1982
Email
cazlex@yahoo.com
Friendster
cazlex@yahoo.com
MSN
taz_alex@hotmail.com

'CAN'T;

DISCLAMER : THIS BLOG IS A ColleCTION of THOTS... Owner Does not hold any responsiblity for ANy ANIMALS/BEAST/pigs/or whateva that were hurt in the process...

'TAKE;

"Because of you"

I will not make
The same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself
Cause my heart so much misery
I will not break
The way you did, you fell so hard
I have learned the hard way
To never let it get that far

Because of you
I never stray
too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
so I don’t get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me,
but everyone around me
Because of you I am afraid

I lose my way
And it’s not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because I know that’s weakness in your eyes
I’m forced to fake
A smile, a laugh, every day of my life
My heart can’t possibly break
When it wasn’t even whole
to start with
I watched you die
I heard you cry every night
in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry
in the middle of the night
For the same damn thing

Because of you
Because of you
Because of you I am afraid

Because of you I never stray
too far from the sidewalk
Because of you I learned to play
on the safe side so I don’t get hurt

Because of you I try my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don’t know how to
let anyone else in
Because of you
I’m ashamed of my life
because it’s empty
Because of you I am afraid

Because of you

'IT;

-MY HISTORY-

May 2005

June 2005

July 2005